Well, as you may know, all are not perfect, but different in one strange and mysterious way. Like, why would a little girl think about breaking into an innocent bear’s house, eating their porridge, breaking a chair, and sabotaging a little bear’s bed? See? Strange, but different. Well this story is far from different. It is so strange, you had better tape your hat on your head because these fairy tales were meant to get mixed up. So you had better go get your fairy tale dictionary. —Sarah Roberts
Goldy Lox walked down the stone path down through the woods to go meet her old granny and give her some medicine for scarlet fever. She had been walking for eight days now because her brother took her convertible to the car repair shop last week. That is when, as greedy as she was, she saw an old cottage painted the color pink across the window with strange light blue shutters and a long dead skunk lying on the doorstep. Her hunger and greediness took over her and she took a peek inside. She walked through the doorway and laughed at the types of furniture there was on display in the rusty looking house.
There were old rocking chairs, one the size of a toddler; one the size of a dog bed, and one half the size of her convertible that was currently parked in a car repair shop. She sat down in the smallest rocking chair. The wood crashed beneath her. Ah poo. She thought to herself. She tried the medium rocking chair. It was wayyyyyy… too over cushioned with pillows. The last one, as she learned the hard way, was full to the touch with creamy milk chocolate. She was very annoyed by this so she decided she would try to find a bedroom to find more clothes to wear. She walked into a fairly large bedroom and opened up a small dresser and pulled out a pair of small corduroys with patched pockets. My mom’s gonna kill me. She thought to herself.
She felt tired after all that had happened that day so she looked around the room and saw three mushrooms. She laid upon the largest of the few. Too hard. She thought. On to the medium one. Too soft as she fell into the softness. She approached the last mushroom with caution, and made sure she laid down properly. Perfect. The mushroom was not too soft and not too hard. As she fell asleep, the front door opened with a crack. In stepped mama, papa, and baby bear. The family was all covered to the touch with corduroys of all sizes.
The family had had a long ride in their hot rod so they decided to sit in their rocking chairs. They all sat down on their chairs except baby bear. He had fallen to the floor and stated to bawl. Baby bears chair was torn to pieces. Mama and papa bear started to get a strange feeling in their head after that incident. They decided to take a nap in their bedroom instead. They opened the door and walked towards their beds. All except baby bear. He was currently pointing at his bed in horror and had a very scared look on his face. Mama and papa bear gasped and ran out of the room holding baby bear under their armpits.
They raced toward the nearest phone and called the cops. Mama bear, Papa bear, baby bear, and about a whole army of cops broke through the doorway and arrested Goldy Lox and everyone lived happily ever after. All except Goldy Lox, who is still to this day locked in a secret prison off the coast of Hawaii.